Water on a bathroom floor is MY NIGHTMARE

A couple weeks ago, we noticed that our downstairs bathroom had a slow leak from the bottom of the toilet. We ended up with water pooling in the grout of the tile floor, and just generally being watery, and that's a problem. I chatted with our landlord about it yesterday, and she came by to check out the bathroom this afternoon.
Her assessment, and I love her for it, is that definitely if we have to pull out the toilet, we might as well replace the tile floor, and then the vanity is outdated maybe, and the lighting could be redone, too. I honestly don't think we'll get all that done, but I love where her head is at.
I expect it'll just be the tile and the toilet, which is fine, of course, so it looks like I might have some home repair and work done within the next couple weeks. I don't even know what I want out of this project, but I'm excited for it.

Images of the new emojis that are being released this year were out and about on the internet today, and I'm quite pleased with the offerings. The flip flop is my jam, and the emoji I'm most excited about. Other worthy additions that I'll use include blueberries, a bison, people in Santa hats, a toothbrush, a roller skate, a TEA POT, and a ninja. I love it when new emojis come out. It's like learning a new word or something, right?

The bigger the tea mug, the better

I have become one of those old women who judge their coffee mugs (I drink TEA, so they're tea mugs from now on in this post) based on how much tea they hold. A 20-ounce tea mug is ideal in my life right now, though 16 will do the trick.
I for reals asked the guy at the Disney Store yesterday how much fluid this particular mug held. It looked like it just might be a 20-oz. mug, but I figured it would definitely hold 16. He didn't know for sure, but I bought it, obviously, because not only did it look big enough, but it's super cute with the Dumbo.
I am delighted to note that even though it's not as big as a 20-ounce mug, it can hold more than 16 ounces, as there was room in the mug once I'd hit that amount of tea. So, I don't know, 18 ounces? That's not a figure I can hit exactly with my Keurig, which is an issue with my neuroses.
Even still, I am enjoying a hot cup of tea in my new Dumbo mug and it's pretty awesome.
Duly noted that I sent Mom a picture of my mug and she asked me how much it held. You see? Old women drinking tea. WE ARE A SISTERHOOD.

Stop chewing gum loudly, you animal

A powerful and all-consuming hatred of mouth noises is called Misophonia.

I've had issues with mouth noises for forever, as noted in my little list of pet peeves down there on the left of the blog. I hate mouth noises; they drive me crazy. (Even when it's the dogs making the mouth noises!) Something else I learned about misophonia is that it is not classified as an auditory or psychiatric condition, so there's that. But I do suffer from it, and come to find out, so does my dear friend Tania.

The conversation started via Marco Polo today because while I was chatting, I inadvertently picked up a potato chip and started eating it, while still recording my Polo. I totally didn't notice until after I'd finished my Polo and listened back to it. Once I'd realized what I'd done, first, I was super grossed out, and then I went against one of the very few rules we have for that thread, which is Do Not Delete Polos, and deleted it and then re-recorded my portion of that conversation.

When I confessed to the group the reason why I deleted the Polo, Tania went on to thank me for that, because she hates mouth noises, too. I agreed with her that mouth noises are the worst. Andrea pointed out that there is a name for our hatred of mouth noises. I did the research (read: Googled it), and discovered "Misophonia."

Now I just need to remember that word, because for my whole life, it's just been "mouth noises."

This is dedicated to the baby I love...

I just finished writing the verbiage for the dedication I'm submitting for Sydney's 8th grade yearbook. I'm allowed 140 words or less, and up to five photos. I've written way fewer than 140 words, probably closer to 70, but I've definitely used up every one of my photo spots!
Sydney requested that I use no more than two baby pictures, which I really didn't do. I chose two little girl pictures but nothing baby-ish. I chose two from this year and one from kinda in the middle of the time span between the little girl and current kid images. So, five photos, and I'm excited to say that they all exhibit some fun and attitude. Nothing as boring as school pics or straight smiley faces.
I've done these dedications, though none as large as this one, over the last several years. This year warrants a half-page dedication. What I found most difficult was coming up with something different than what I've said before. I have so many phrases and words that I love to say that describe how awesome my kid is, and I'm afraid I overuse them. I kind of just stuck with the usual stuff, but added some extra because I had the space for it. Still, I'll reread it all tomorrow and be sure I like it, or add and/or subtract what I need.
These things are always so hard because she'll have this yearbook, for like, forever, and my words must be profound, moving, inspiring and loving. You know, like *everything* I write.

Books are important to life

I did one of my favorite things today: I went to Barnes & Noble and wandered the stacks, gathering ideas for my library queue. Yes, I am still a very frequent reader at my local library. I found six books to add to my queue. Also today, I started the book I have at home right now, "Capturing the Devil," and tonight I'm still undecided about it, but at only page 39, there's still plenty of book to get me interested in knowing what happens at the end.
Sydney made me read a meme tonight that said that reading was just staring at a dead tree and hallucinating. Beyond completely ignoring the whole, you know, WRITTEN WORDS aspect of a book, which is a pretty big part of the whole thing, that entire meme is the worst take on one of the most important creations in the history of the world. That's not even hyperbole, you guys.
Of course, she does it all to torture me because books are so important and the best things ever.

No vanilla, no, no, no

Ugh, oh my god, you guys, I hate the smell of vanilla. I've always hated the smell of vanilla. To be more specific, it's that synthetic vanilla smell that I can't stand. I don't mind the smell of like actual pure vanilla for cooking. But that candle smell? No thank you. Lotions and potions? Nope. All those other random vanilla things? Icky.
Tonight, my kid totally grossed me out by playing with some Crazy Aaron's Thinking Putty that smells of vanilla. And then she went and rubbed her hands on my sweatshirt sleeves, and now my sweatshirt STINKS of vanilla. Yuck, yuck, yuck!
Vanilla smell is terrible. That is all.

@paperbagsandsharpies on the Instagram

I do this random thing every morning for Sydney's lunch bags: I draw little images on them. I think the beauty and fun of them is that I am not a good drawer. They are so elementary looking, and full of stick figures and animals and bugs, but I find them very amusing. Sydney, of course, does not find them as amusing as I do, and many days ends up trying to hide them (I found this out not long ago).
But I'm stubborn, and I find them fun, so I continue to draw them. I decided last week though that this would be the last year/semester that I draw on her bags. In a few months, she'll be done with middle school and heading to high school, and that's just not at all the place where moms continue to draw on lunch bags.
I've had an Instagram for my lunch bag drawings, and you know what's interesting? There is a very real community of parents who draw on their kids' lunch bags, and post them to their Instagram. Some of them are really, really good, too, which is what makes it so much fun for me to post mine. I've never sought any of these people out, but over the last couple years, I've amassed 75 followers. I follow a few too, and it's lovely how we all like and support each other's art. For me, I'd put "art" in quotation marks, but for so many of the others, their drawings are very, very well done. They're awesome, in fact! Such wonderful color, and detail, and care and humor put into their lunch bags and napkins. It's amazing to be a part of it. So, I'll miss that, for sure. But again, oh well; I guess I'll hang out under a tree and read a book instead.

Maybe I'm just used to them not working now

So the problem with my hand for the last year is "handwriting dystonia." I have visited a carpal tunnel specialist, orthopedic surgeon, nerve specialist and neurologist. The neurologist is who gave me an official diagnosis, and who I am currently seeing to treat my issue.
The dystonia is causing my arm muscle to flex uncontrollably, and is thereby flexing my index and middle finger uncontrollably. Hence, my inability to type, and the difficulty I have in writing for more than a couple words.
The first attempt to treat the dystonia was a few shots of xeomin, similar to Botox but purer and stronger, in an effort to weaken the muscle, thereby letting me type and control the fingers better. I had this injection in October, and my ring and middle fingers are still weak, though now I can at least lift and move them. Yes, the first injection rendered my fingers unusable, leaving me with a claw on the right hand. Not at all how I had hoped that would go.
The xeomin is mostly worn off now, but I still have marked weakness in those two fingers. Doctor says they'll be back to normal in another couple weeks. When my dystonia symptoms return though, I have a new oral medication to take for them. The medication may make it difficult for me to pee, give me dry mouth and one other thing I don't remember right now, so that's not good, but it's another option at least.
If that doesn't work, we can try, among other things, another injection at a weaker dose and in a different place. He was skeptical of my suggestion of acupuncture, because it won't help for more than a couple hours or days; and if I decide to try out some of Mom's CBD/THC muscle balm, he wants to know all about it so he can write a paper because there's not precedent for that.
At any rate, my fingers are still unfixed, but they're working just a little better now, and the experiments continue on how best to treat this stupid affliction.

But really, I have many, many kryptonites

I love garlic bread. It's among my most favorite things to eat always, and I can never say no to it. Brian and I bought a box of frozen Texas toast the other day, and I decided to bake some with our dinner tonight. The pieces were nice and thick, but if you can believe it, they had just a touch too much butter because the toast wouldn't crisp at all. Still, I ate two pieces and I can't be mad about it.
I hate the after-effects of garlic bread. It is physically impossible for me to go more than an hour or so after I've eaten garlic bread before I have to brush my teeth. I hate the taste of garlic in my mouth. That is so well-known in my house that Brian came upstairs and sang a little "Kimmie hates garlic in her mouth" song as I brushed. He's clever, and I'm good with the song.
Garlic bread is my kryptonite: I'm unable to resist it, and it hurts me after I've finished with it.

There is a Cookie Angel; I met her today

By far, the best part of my day today was the 5-year-old Girl Scout, a "Daisy," who came to my house this afternoon to sell cookies. Oh my god, you guys, she was so frickin' adorable. She and her mom had an amazing cookie wagon set-up, with boxes of cookies and a sign above it that said, "cookies."
I had a wonderful time chatting with her. We discussed all her badges on her vest, all the different cookies and how much they each cost, and how many boxes she'd sold already on her first day. Her favorite cookie is Samoa, so she approved of my purchasing a box of those, and she was happy I bought the new Lemon-Ups.
My favorite interaction though, was regarding my purchase of the Do-Si-Dos, which she told me were pronounced "Doo-see-dooos." Her mom said, no, "Do-Si-Dos" is correct, and then my favorite Girl Scout ever picked up the box, pointed to the "Do," and said, "THAT says DO." Honestly, there's no arguing with that. She's right; and from now on, I will pronounce them "Doo-See-Doos."
I hope she comes back next week.

Time to make a list, friends

So in honor of it being my birthday yesterday, Brian and I ate a couple "special" gummies last night. I'm here to tell you that the gummy did absolutely nothing for me. It was the second time that we tried them, and this time, maybe it's because we weren't doing anything fun, but I just got tired and wanted to go to sleep.
Brian will say that it was my fault because we ate them so late, but we ate them at like 6:30, and then we just sat and watched television. So in my opinion, it was lack of actual fun activities that killed the gummy experience last night. I'm not giving up, by any means, and I will try again, it's just that last night was a buster.
As for book stuff, I received my marketing postcards on Saturday, and they look super awesome, so now I've got something to hand out to people so they remember my book. I also emailed the procurement manager at a place to find out how I submit my book to their organization. So, I've made a query! Excellent! I need to create a bullet point list of people and places to query and submit though. I hate not being able to cross these things off as I tick through them.
The yearbook arrived at my doorstep yesterday, and it was super trippy reading through it again. Sydney's main takeaway? She was surprised that people wrote full paragraphs to each other in the yearbooks, rather than the irritating "H.A.G.S." acronym that the kids nowadays write ("Have a Great Summer," so you know). I've been complaining about H.A.G.S. for a couple years in regards to her yearbooks, and now she knows why. Kids these days are too lazy to even write out a paragraph for their friends' yearbooks.
I get to sleep in tomorrow morning because Sydney has the day off. That's all I have to say about that.

All the books and a puzzle

So about the yearbook. Come to find out, the guy who stole it worked for a little while for my step-dad, and as far as we can figure, I must have had it at the office one day and he lifted it from there.

That sounds plausible, but I'm having a very hard time trying to remember why I had brought it to the office after I had graduated, because I know I still had it when I finished high school. I know I was in college when I realized it was missing. I'm struggling though, to figure out this timeline.

Anyway, it was the sister of the guy who stole it who messaged me, and it was the guy's mom who found my yearbook in her garage and asked his sister to find me. She messaged me on October 30, and I'm super lucky that she chose to hold on to the yearbook for those more than two months before I replied. The whole thing is a crazy situation, and I'm so excited to have one of my life's mysteries solved.

In regards to other books, I have two from the library that I need to get to reading. They both have zero renewals, so I really need to be sure I get to them soon. I was in the queue for both of them for months, and I'm excited about reading them, but I do need to just sit with them.

Of course, having said that, I also have a puzzle I want to do.

A totally non-natural red going on here

I got my hair colored red today. It's the first time I've ever had my whole head dyed in a color other than brown. That's not to say that I've never had my hair colored other than brown, it's just that the chunks and streaks were not my whole head before, and today, my whole head is red. And I love it. It's super awesome. I don't know how long it'll last, but I've got my sulfate-free shampoo for the long haul, I hope. My next appointment is in six weeks rather than the eight weeks I usually go between hair colorings, so it'll be nice and fresh for Sydney's spring break and our trip out to California. This may become my usual hair color for a while. It makes me happy.

Also! Mom has taken possession of the high school yearbook that I can for sure say was stolen from me more than 20 years ago, and has shipped it to me here. It'll arrive on Saturday, and I can finally put it back on the shelf with its brethren where it belongs. Dudes steal things, and I'll never understand that, but somewhere out there also are the people that'll find your stolen stuff and then find you and contact you, and ensure that you get your stuff back. So, in all this, Keri is the hero, and all is well. A 25-year mystery solved and resolved within 24 hours. It's very crazy. And it's a really good story.

Totes eager to mosey back that way

Our favorite restaurant out here is called Oregano's. It's some awesome and delicious Italian food and pizza, and a truly amazing dessert. We go about as often as we can, and for many a special occasion. There are many Oregano's locations out here in the desert, and our closest was about 15 to 20 minutes away.
That is until just a couple days ago. Because on Monday, the newest Oregano's location opened, all of three minutes from our house. According to Google, it's exactly three minutes door to door. And that is pretty fantastic.
So tonight, since it was our first night where Sydney felt better and Brian got home early enough, we ventured over to our newest local Oregano's. We got a parking spot out front, and waited only about 10 minutes. Sydney ordered her usual, and it was as good as it always is. I ordered the mac and cheese, and unfortunately, it came out southwestern instead of traditional style, as I had ordered it. So it was way spicier than I wanted. Brian enjoyed his sautéed shrimp dish. The stuffed mushrooms weren't great. But, all in all, it was exactly what I expected for a new restaurant shaking off the dust. The service was perfect, and we're very much looking forward to going back soon. Maybe even this weekend?
You know what; I just realized that I didn't order my free birthday pizza cookie tonight. I totally forgot I had that email! Well, then we are definitely going back this weekend!

A new ITEM! list for 2020

ITEM!: I received my box of author copies today, and now I only await the arrival of my marketing postcards. Then, it's time to hit the streets and start selling this book and getting it into stores and onto shelves. I've already got consignment sheets for two independent book stores, so I need to get them a couple copies. The it's on to other places. Time to start making my list!
ITEM!: I got contacted via Facebook by a woman in Camarillo who has my freshman year high school yearbook. The yearbook disappeared during some home improvements more than 20 years ago, and this woman's mother happens to have found it, and was in search of me. Of course, because I don't allow any Facebook notifications to my phone, I didn't discover this message until today. She'd sent it on October 30! So now I sit and wait for her to reply back to me, and hopefully set up a meeting with her and Mom to change possession of the book. I'm beyond eager to hear back from her, and hope that she doesn't make me wait more than two months before replying.
ITEM!: Of the nine Best Picture nominees, I have already seen two: "Ford v. Ferrari" and "Once Upon a Time ... in Hollywood." I watched the first 30 minutes of "Joker," but I'm not counting that as a full viewing. I really have little interest in seeing most of the others, such as "1917," "The Irishman," "Little Women," "Marriage Story," and "Parasite." I do want to see "Jojo Rabbit." So, here I am again, in deep for the Oscars competition, and only having seen a minority of the nominated movies.
ITEM!: Thinking about diving back into the Weight Watchers. It worked so well for me, and I'm eager to get some structure and balance back into my eating. I didn't like how the program changed last year, so I'm hoping to get back to the program parameters I had a couple years ago.

#adultpersonproblems, I guess?

I saw a meme the other day that's one of those "you know you're an adult when" sayings. That particular day's saying ended with "you have a favorite spatula." This entertained me on a number of levels because I do have favorite spatulas.
I have favorite scrambled-eggs spatulas, from Ikea, of which I have three or four, and I actually bought a few of them for Mom's house because I didn't like her spatulas there. I have the better, thinner cookie spatula for when they're fresh from the oven. I have the better, smoother fried-egg spatula, for flipping eggs when making them for a sandwich. I have the beefy, thick spatulas, for mixing batters and heavy stirring.
What you see here is the fried-egg flipping spatula, that I think I've had for a good 25 years, and its current state. It got caught in the drawer, I've been told, and the end got wedged in the drawer and it broke. This is upsetting, you guys.
I have no idea how hard it'll be to find a new one of these; I've never looked for a replacement. But for now, at this moment, finding another one of these is an insurmountable task, and I'll have to live the rest of my life without the proper spatula for flipping fried eggs for my sandwiches.
I guess I really, really know I'm an adult now.

They bark and chirp and zoom, oh my!

I don't know if you guys know this or not, but Arizona has a very large hummingbird population. In fact, there's even a hummingbird preserve down in the south of the state. And yes, here in my town, there are a lot of hummingbirds.
We have a feeder in our backyard, and have had it for well more than a year. Brian is the chef, and I keep an eye on the food level for them, so they don't ever go without for long. Our birds though, have gotten very used to us having a feeder out in the backyard, and they get bitchy when it's empty. They chirp and bark at us and even better, zoom our heads when we go outside and their feeder is empty.
Such happened yesterday. Sydney and I were in the front taking down the Christmas lights. I heard a little dude barking at us from the tree out there, and saw him sitting up atop the branches, watching us in the front yard. I asked him if the feeder was empty and if he was trying to tell me something, and he barked at me some more. So when we were down out front, I checked out the backyard. Little dude zoomed my head three times as I made my way out to the feeder, and yes, it was empty.
I brought it inside and Brian filled it and replaced it last night, and I expect the every little flyer was happy and full up on food this morning. Our birds are awesome, and their attitudes are the best in the whole world.

Juicy juice juice juice, yummy juice

We went on our first big family vacation this past summer, to Maui, and had a wonderful, amazing, fantastic time. Mom and I have been several times; Brian has been once or twice; and this was Sydney's first visit.
So when we wandered into a convenience store and I saw some Aloha pineapple/orange juice, I knew what I was about to drink, and I knew it would be awesome. I drank that juice all week. I was very sad to leave Maui, for very many reasons, but I also knew that I would miss my favorite juice.
I've checked, and if I want a case of the juice, it'll cost me $36 on Amazon. Wow. It costs more than beer, you guys, because it tastes better. I can get a six-pack for $17. (I'm actually thinking about that one. Amazon Prime has Saturday delivery on it... ).
Anyway, I found a bottle of Dole juice, an orange juice with pineapple juice in it, and I thought that maybe, just maybe, it'll taste as good. I'm disappointed, to say the least, in the very real difference between pineapple juice with orange juice in it, and orange juice with pineapple juice in it. The Dole juice has the bite of the orange juice experience, with the minimal sweetness of the pineapple in there, and that does absolutely nothing for me. Thankfully, Brian really likes the Dole, so it won't be wasted.
I'll sit here and just dream about my pineapple/orange juice cans.

Yes, a dinosaur and a little girl, obvs

Alright, so I did a thing last year. I finally published my book, "Mystic and Boysen Go to the Dentist." It's a fun, charming and rhyming children's book with bright and engaging illustrations, about a little girl and her dinosaur who need to visit the dentist to help them with a sore mouth. It's on Amazon, available in hardcover, paperback and eBook. I'm very excited about it; it's super awesome, and I did manage to sell a bunch of copies last year. Still, I want to sell way more.

So, how does someone do that when they've self-published, and have a limited reach with their social media? Well, that's an excellent question, my friends. I've set up the professional Facebook page, the professional Instagram, and the professional Twitter. I've tried to get more followers, but when the followers I do have don't share stuff, no one new finds it. So, I'm on the hunt for a new way to get people to find me. I'm getting more active on Twitter; trying new things on Instagram; posting more on Facebook. Any other suggestions? 

Yesterday, I found out who to contact to get my book in the public library system here; I need to email her tonight. There's a local author book sale at a library branch in a couple weeks, but I'm too late to be a part of it, so I'm going with postcards, book copies and my lead sales associate, Leslie.

This year, my goal is to make this book a real, bonafide success, and I'm going to need all the help from my friends and my new-found confidence in this project to do it.

So, the blog here will start to track the success of my efforts to market and publicize this little beauty, as well as my process for getting the next book done. 

"Get Shit Done 2020"

You guys, I'm sitting on my bed writing on a laptop, comfortably ready to create something for my blog. Not entirely sure how creative I can be tonight, because I'm relatively tired and not feeling too terribly articulate, but here I am!
Here's my avatar for January. She's deep underwater, kind of like how I'm feeling goals-wise, but still showing a bit of confidence, because she knows that "bird by bird" things just might work out okay. Also, kind of like how I'm feeling about now. Still, it's early January, and I've got a lot of time to get myself together. Because this year is "Get Shit Done 2020."
It's all good though, friends, as I have an extensive bullet-point list of stuff to get done (it's not written yet, of course), and I feel like the bullet points will help the whole thing work out better. I love crossing things off a list, and this year will be an excellent one for that.
But check me out, I've already started on one of my EXPECTATIONs for the new year: Writing the blog again!

So that happened

Took some time off last year, I guess, and now I'm digging into the blog again.
I actually posted something else for the blog last night, but the text got all wonky and weird and that made me super mad so today, I deleted the whole post and I'm writing something fresh to see if it works better.
I have a new laptop coming my way next week, so I'll be much more comfortable writing something in my Happy Place again, which is on my bed at night with the TV on. Today, right now, I'm at my desk at work, making sure that this whole thing works better for me than it did last night.
So, let's see, by posting this...

A New Year Haiku