No polish, and I want those slippers

I gave myself an at-home pedicure scrub yesterday. Truth be told, I did try to get myself an appointment for an actual pedicure, but the salon didn't answer the phone. So before you think too much that I was being frugal or safe ... no, no, the salon didn't pick up the phone.
So I became my own pedicurist for a very specific reason: to scrub the dead skin off the bottom of my feet. My feet bottoms have been grossing me out a lot lately, and in fact, the dead skin has been peeling from them, to add to the grossness level. And really, that needed to be rectified.
I filled up the kitchen sink with hot water and dish soap, let them soak for several minutes, and then got to work on them. I started with my basic foot file, and scraped the shit out of the skin on my right foot. After that, I brought in the big gun, the callus remover/cheese grater, and finished the job. No joke, five full minutes later, the bottom of my right foot looked pretty decent, like I had a relatively good pedicure. After that, the left foot was up for its treatment. And again, five minutes later, it looked pretty decent.
But this morning, you guys, my feet felt awesome to walk around on. They were soft, non-crusty and smooth. And I knew that all my efforts yesterday were service to a higher cause.