Stay strong, 805

My heart is broken today, and it was rendered by yet another angry white man with access to a gun, who decided to kill other people because he was having sad-face issues. I oversimplify, and I know that, but these incidents make me so mad at the fucking guys who can't handle their shit. I mean really, there are a whole of people on this planet, and we're all able to handle our shit and not kill other people, so it gets really frustrating and maddening when some jerkwad comes along and feels like they need to make the world burn.
Thousand Oaks is right down the street from my hometown, and in fact was my home for a few years. This shooting at Borderline, a bar that I've been to several times, broke me yesterday, and it's been a while since I spent a good portion of my day crying at the news. Friends and parents of friends are right down the street, and it was heartbreaking to hear and see them hurting in response to this. I know how I was feeling, and while we were able to hold a little therapy session yesterday and talk about it together, I'm still in a hangover of sorrow.
I want to be there so I can hug my people and my cities, and just be a loving presence in the area. I know I can't help with anything really real, and that's a special kind of hopelessness -- no blood donations or community center donations from me here. I'm just sitting at the computer and phone worrying and hurting. What a fucking sucky thing to happen.
Still, I love that place, and will move my family there as soon as I'm ever able to, because it's one of the best places ever. Feel my hug, you guys.