Make the fingers work properly, please

I think I'm going to have to get someone to look at my hand. By someone, of course, I mean a doctor. I was having wrist and finger issues several months ago, and did exercises and all that, and found a new way to place my arm for using the mouse, but over the last few weeks, I've been having issues again.
On the up side, there's been no pain. But on the very frustrating side, my fingers aren't being cooperative. My index finger doesn't want to bend. Whenever given the opportunity, it'll shoot out straight, making me push the wrong key or click unnecessarily. It won't stay bent, not matter how I plead, or how slow I go. I've had so many mistypes; and so many irritating things to fix, like, every sentence has an error, and must be fixed. That's not how I do things, and having a hand that's just not cooperating is driving me crazy.
I'm waiting for my annual exam with my gynecologist next month to ask her if she has any hand doctor recommendations. I've been dealing for a couple months now, what's another one? Still, I'm eager to get some sort of medical diagnosis here.

Follow the BLUE brick road

Hey, you guys! Did you see? Arizona voted in its first female senator, and she's a Democrat, too!
Sometimes, kiddos, the vote goes the way that you really want it to. It certainly didn't last time, which is perhaps why it did this time, for some perspective.
But Arizona has been a staunchly Republican state for several years. The last Democrat senator was elected in 1988, and it's been decidedly red since then, for some reason. Anyone know what the tipping point for no more blue senators was? It was way before my time here, so I have no historical knowledge of it.
Also, two House seats were changed to blue in this election, and the balance of power in Arizona is remarkably purple. Odds are it gets bluer in the next couple elections... I'm quite pleased to have been a part of this shift.

I took Sydney to the Tuesday Night Classic movie tonight, and we saw "The Wizard of Oz." She didn't fall asleep or ask to leave, so I consider this evening a win. She told me that she didn't like it as much as she thought she would, but again, she didn't ask to leave early, or even make any comment about the black-and-white part, so I think she may have liked it more than she thinks.
I found myself at a bit of a crossroads though, and I have since talked myself out of it. I briefly considered that maybe since she doesn't really dig the classic movies, I should stop taking her to see them. But then I said to myself, "No, she needs to know these classics, or she'll never understand a ton of pop-culture references, or have any appreciation for entertainment before YouTube and Marvel." And I found that I was really okay with that reasoning. The tickets are only $5, and for that, I can torture her a little bit and teach her something about movies.
I'm a good movie mom, and I'm going to keep being that mom. Tonight, she learned what a Munchkin was, where the yellow brick road leads, and why sometimes, there's no place like home.

Happy anniversary, worker bee

Today is my three-year anniversary at my job. No one knows it but me, and I only told one of my coworkers. It's been an interesting experience at this particular job stop, working in an environment like never before.
After a year on the job, I was submarined by a coworker, and therefore demoted to doing my current part-time job position.
It was a hit to the ego, for sure, but the demotion ended up being the best thing that had happened in the job. I was back to picking up and dropping off my kid at school at regular times, and I was still able to use my brain, and I had time to myself again.
What's weird is that this is the first job I've had where I have a really hard time keeping track of time. Like, if I didn't have Facebook Memories, I'd be at a loss over how long I've even been working there. I'm not even sure how long I've been part time, but it's been at least a year, but maybe only a year? It's a trip to me that I have no concept of the passage of time at that desk. At all my other jobs, I was always very aware of the passage of time, by way of anniversaries, and remembered everything. Here, I'm all, "I think it was November, wasn't it?" I vaguely remember the demotion happening some time in the cooler months?
One would wonder why I'm still working there. It's a matter of convenience. I like the hours, the location, and some of the people. I'd rather work there part time than anywhere else right now. And no one wants to do the job that I do, so I have relative job security. I do get the itch though, to move on to something else. And then I remember that I only work four hours a day three minutes from my home.

Looking forward to my Turkey Day, for sure

Brian and I baked a turkey yesterday so we could have turkey meat for sandwiches. It was super fun, my sandwich last night was delicious, and my house smelled awesome. I found myself hungry for all the fixin's though, too, and I had to go without. I'll just have to wait a week for my potatoes, stuffing and whatnot, I suppose. I shall just have to live my life with fresh turkey sandwiches until then...
I'm actually very much looking forward to my Thanksgiving holiday. California beckons, and my schedule/agenda for the five days we'll be there is full up already. Time with friends, family and Mickey Mouse is what I'm eager to enjoy, and all things are pretty sparkly and happy when peering into next week.

I see candy crushing in my sleep

Oops, I did it again.
I played with the phone.
Got lost in the game.

And because of that, I deleted Candy Crush tonight.
I started playing about 4 p.m. this afternoon, when Sydney took over the television to play her Spider-Man game on the PlayStation. I had a book, but thought, nope, I'll just play Candy Crush for a little while. Six hours later, with just a couple small breaks for food and drink, I put the phone down, disgusted with myself.
"Hello. My name is Kimberly. And I'm a Candy Crush addict."
But I've quit cold turkey before, and I'm doing it again. I deleted the app from my phone directly after stopping, and put the phone down.
I'm done. No more Candy Crush.

Stay strong, 805

My heart is broken today, and it was rendered by yet another angry white man with access to a gun, who decided to kill other people because he was having sad-face issues. I oversimplify, and I know that, but these incidents make me so mad at the fucking guys who can't handle their shit. I mean really, there are a whole of people on this planet, and we're all able to handle our shit and not kill other people, so it gets really frustrating and maddening when some jerkwad comes along and feels like they need to make the world burn.
Thousand Oaks is right down the street from my hometown, and in fact was my home for a few years. This shooting at Borderline, a bar that I've been to several times, broke me yesterday, and it's been a while since I spent a good portion of my day crying at the news. Friends and parents of friends are right down the street, and it was heartbreaking to hear and see them hurting in response to this. I know how I was feeling, and while we were able to hold a little therapy session yesterday and talk about it together, I'm still in a hangover of sorrow.
I want to be there so I can hug my people and my cities, and just be a loving presence in the area. I know I can't help with anything really real, and that's a special kind of hopelessness -- no blood donations or community center donations from me here. I'm just sitting at the computer and phone worrying and hurting. What a fucking sucky thing to happen.
Still, I love that place, and will move my family there as soon as I'm ever able to, because it's one of the best places ever. Feel my hug, you guys.

Candy Crush, be kind to me, please

I can't explain why I've decided to punish and torture myself again, but I have re-downloaded Candy Crush onto my phone. I chose it on a whim, because I needed to test my iTunes password, and now I'm in a wormhole. I'm currently on level 148, and am waiting now for my lives to replenish. I'll admit that it feels a little bit less stressful this time around, and I find that it is a bit easier to set the phone down when my eyes get tired or I run out of lives. I don't seem to be twitchy for the game when I'm not playing it. In fact, it's almost exclusively an afternoon/evening game, and I am fine not even going near it in the morning.
Still, I could kick myself for putting my mind, heart and psyche through this torturous game again. But I also know that I will survive deleting it off the phone with little to no ill effects. All the same, I'm killing time right now waiting to be able to play again.
Isn't it so cute, though? Doesn't look at all like a brain-melting time and sleep trap, right? Sometimes, when I close my eyes at night, I see candies exploding.

I guess she's not a dancing queen anymore

Well, tonight, it happened. I lost a fight against the opinions of "friends at school."
Sydney and I watched "Mamma Mia" a few months ago, and she loved it. I love that movie, and it was so fun for me that she enjoyed the music and movie as much as I do. We have the soundtrack in the car, and we've been rocking out to it regularly.
So when Fathom Events showed the movie today at a theater to celebrate its 10th anniversary, we were excited to watch it. She'd never seen it on the big screen, and she was looking forward to it. In the theater today though, she wouldn't sing along with me to her favorite songs, and was really ready to leave when it was over. On our walk back to the car she admitted that she and her friends talked about "Mamma Mia" today, and they gave her a hard time because she likes the movie, and made fun of it to the point that she decided that she didn't like the movie that much anymore.
"I'm sorry I don't like the movie as much anymore," she said.
"I'm sorry that you're letting your friends decide what you like or not," I said.
"They're not really my friends, but I know them," she said.
"Well, then I'm really sorry you're letting people you don't even call friends decide what you like or not," I countered.
I won't lie; this is insanely disappointing to me. It makes me super sad that she was so easily swayed by her peers ... in regards to a movie about ABBA songs. To be sentimental, I'll whine about how we enjoyed this movie together, and sang the songs together. And now she's decided that it's not a good movie because of some fucking punks in a middle school cafeteria. I breathe a heavy sigh.

You guys, democracy is awesome

It's Election Day, my friends, and I hope you took advantage of your right as a United States citizen to vote for your representatives!
Brian and I are enrolled in the mail-in ballot program here in Arizona, so we got our ballots weeks ago, and mailed them in shortly thereafter. I'm proud to have voted for what I hope will be a Blue Wave in Arizona, where we have a real chance to vote in a Democrat senator for like the first time ever.
I'll be glued to election results all night tonight, and am really hoping that there is some progressive change in this state done today. I mean, we'll see, but I'm feeling an energy that's different than ever before, and let's hope that translates into votes. It's certainly deflating to be reading about all the "problems" at some polling places, and one would think that these places would have their shit together for at least a couple days before an election that they have known was coming for years, right? Alas, they're not, but I hope those vote-casting warriors stay the course and fight for their ballot to be counted.

Just keep writing... Just keep writing

I had an idea on what to write about tonight, but for the life of me, I can't remember what it was right now. I would say that my not remembering is a sign of old age, but this has been an issue since I started writing this blog. I'd get an idea at some point during the day, and by the time I sat down at night, I had forgotten what the idea was.
Why don't you just make a note? you might ask.
Excellent question. I've tried a couple different note-keeping options, but they've all lacked ease of use and efficiency. More times than not, I just don't have pen and paper. And in all honesty, I've never been able to use a note function on my phone with any competence.
So I depend on my memory. And that, to put it mildly, is faulty. So here I sit.
And I still have no idea what I wanted to write about.

Honestly, just leave us the hell alone

We had such a moment with a man yesterday, and it reminded me tremendously of that scene in the "Designing Women" episode when the guy came over the ladies' table to chat because they were just a bunch of ladies and he thought he'd join them.
Roberta, Lilly and I were sitting at an outside table on a resort patio having a perfectly lovely chat yesterday, resting in the shade and enjoying each other's company, when this man came over and sat with us. He had a Scrabble game with him, and just plunked down in the third small loveseat in the seating area we were occupying. Before you ask, there were a TON of empty tables and chairs, so it wasn't because he didn't have anywhere else to sit. He sat with us. Uninvited and unwanted. We continued our conversation as we were, but he kept INTERJECTING into our conversation. We did our best to ignore him, but he kept butting in. So finally, I whispered to Roberta that I wanted to be rude. She agreed, but before letting me go off, said, "Perhaps we should take a walk around?" I said, "Yes, and I could use some water." Lilly agreed, and we all got up. As we walked away, the guy says, "I hope I'm not driving you away..." We continued to ignore, and went inside to find another table, where we sat for another 30 minutes.
DUDE. Understand this: You were neither invited nor wanted in our conversation. We ignored you, hoping you'd take the hint. We got up and left because YES, YOU WERE DRIVING US AWAY. What is it about dudes that makes them think that a group of women strangers would give two fiddlefucks about their opinion on ANYTHING? Like, if we wanted a man's opinion, we would have invited our own men to be a part of the conversation! Or like we would be all, "Oh! You've saved us from our girly talk and frivolousness with your SCRABBLE GAME AND SPARKLING CONVERSATION AND PERSONALITY!"
NO! All men! Leave a group of women to their own peace and conversation. They don't want you there. They WILL GET UP AND ACTIVELY LEAVE YOUR PRESENCE. JUST DON'T BUG THEM AT ALL.

She really just sat there the whole time

I got to benignly torture a woman in the bathroom today.
I went in to the lobby bathroom to change into my hiking shorts and shoes, and was dismayed to discover that someone had taken the larger stall for themselves, though all indications showed that she didn't need it. So I was stuck having to change my clothes and shoes in the small stall. Well, I got about halfway undressed when I realized that there was no sound coming from the stall next to mine. And as I finished undressing and putting on my workout top, it was still quiet and still over there. My snap assumption was that she is one of those women who won't poop or fart in the stall while someone else is in the bathroom. So, I started taking my time. And really paying attention. And it occurred to me that she really wasn't making noise, and really was waiting for me to leave. So then I really slowed down. I don't think it's ever taken me so long to put on socks and shoes, or to pack up my normal clothes back into my bag. And then I had to wash my hands of course, and be sure that they were totally dry before I could toss out the paper towels. And then I finally left.
And I giggled about the woman who was too afraid or embarrassed to potty with someone else in the bathroom and how she just sat there until I left. Was that bad?