No, no ... she's sleeping

Kimberly's disturbing giggle for the day:
An 80-year-old woman in Cleveland was served with a search warrant for building, housing and health code violations. When the police knocked on her door, she told them that they couldn't come in, because her mother was sleeping. The officers convinced her that they would be quiet, and she finally allowed them access. The woman's mother, come to find out, was a three years' dead skeleton in a bed.
What's the least bit funny here? Say, yours truly goes a little bit mad in her old age, while, of course, living with her mother. Could you not see me becoming this crazy woman who will not, NOT, let anyone take away her mommy? I'd go into the room every day, I'm sure, tell her the latest news, maybe read an amusing blog post, and then quietly close the door, and go about the rest of my daily chores.
I told Mom about it, and really, the fact that I just might lose my mind to such a degree had us in a fit of giggles on the phone this morning.

It's a bird! A plane!

Brian and I came to a realization last night. Our Saturday morning movie matinees have spoiled us for seeing any films at any other time. We went last night to our favorite theater to see Superman Returns. The theater itself wasn't packed or anything, but there still seemed to be that required group of teenage boys who sat in the back, who thought that by making their comments loud enough for everyone to hear, they were really funny. Not so. We go to the movies, first and foremost, to enjoy the movie-going experience. To me, that does not include kids who make inappropriate sounds during the film's quiet moments. While the people who laugh at them the first time are the initial offenders that make the boys continue, it's inevitably the one guy who yells, "Okay, that's enough!" that really gets them going. My contention is that if no one laughs the first time, they'll quiet down. But for the one guy who tells them to be quiet, he only acts as a catalyst for them to exhibit more thuggish behavior. At any rate, between the kids making noise and the fact that it felt so late when we got out, we've decided that sticking with our weekend matinee schedule is the best option for us. Does that make us old fogeys? To some, perhaps. I prefer to think that it makes us movie connoisseurs who know when and where a movie is best enjoyed.
And as for the film, I dug it. The new Superman is hot, by the way. Brian liked the flick, though not as much as I. He doesn't think there's a market for the strict goodness that is Superman anymore, where I felt it was refreshing. Sure, there was emotional angst and heft involved this time around; sure, this movie made Supes a bit more human. But that's the right direction, I think. To have him be nothing more than a poster boy for good is boring. The Lois/Superman love story was satisfying, and I find myself eager for the sequel (because you know there's going to be one!). Oh, and per usual, Kevin Spacey was phenomenal.

Publicity bazaar

Are these the actions of someone who wants their privacy at any cost? Someone who wants it so desperately that she will go on national television and beg for it? Someone who just wants everyone to stop picking on her and leave her and her family in peace?
I've heard from several people about Britney Spears' interview with Matt Lauer, and how trashy it was. I didn't watch it. Really, I figured it would be a train wreck, and had thought that I would protect myself by not sitting through it. After all, I know that, when she's not in a video or singing a song, she's going to be a disaster. Don't think for a second that I didn't read everything about it though: messy hair, nasty makeup, crying unattractively, gum chewing and the unflattering outfit. Oh, I read ALL about it.
And now we have the cover of Bazaar's August issue. The photo, actually, is lovely. She looks quite happy and pretty, and the necklace is awesome. (Think how much better the post-interview coverage would have been had she had this person do her face and hair prior to sitting down with Lauer.) Images from the photo shoot, which only took place last week, have already leaked on to the Web, hence Bazaar's action to get the cover out in cyberspace as soon as yesterday. The photos will certainly bring to mind Demi Moore's controversial -- at the time --Vanity Fair cover in 1991. (I never saw Demi's photos, but can only imagine how cool they were. Vanity Fair doesn't do anything non-cool.) It's hard to believe that no pregnant celebrity has done this kind of thing since then. But I digress ...
This is not the kind of thing a person who pleads for privacy does. This girl, as I must call her, is a publicity enigma. She feeds off it, yet feels the need to purge right after. She's got publicity bulimia. "Don't follow me or ask questions, but here, look at me naked."

Who will die?

So you're all probably, "Why, oh why, hasn't she said anything about the Harry Potter news streaking through the Internet yet?"
Well, you may not appreciate it, but I know that once random tidbits about the new book start to spread around -- even something as innocuous as J.K Rowling saying that two characters may die in this one -- it's getting close to reading time. Look at the history of the series' publicity: bit of news designed to get people talking; one or two more facts a month or so later; the book's title is released in a cleverly subversive way; and then the publishing date is announced. It's gone that way for the last three tomes: Goblet of Fire, Order of the Phoenix, and the most-recent Half-Blood Prince. It's a brilliant strategy, and obviously, one that works.
So the big dust up this week is about Rowling hinting to the two characters that allegedly die in the final volume. Of course, it's common knowledge that Rowling has had the final chapter of the final book written since she started along the H.P. path. (A feat, in itself, that is amazing.) It's also common knowledge that she's not afraid to kill any character. I hate to speculate on who the deaths might be, but I do have a couple thoughts.
Harry Potter: Rowling slyly mentioned that Harry may not be left standing on the last page. I, for one, don't buy it. He's the hero, and while the hero doesn't always survive, this is still a series of novels that punishes the evil and rewards the good. I don't see Rowling being so vindictive as to kill H.P. just to prove that she can.
Draco Malfoy: I'm thinking he'll die, but he's not a "big death." He's just the punk that deserves to get it in the end.
Lord Voldemort: He's definitely dying, but in a bizarre and rather odd way. That's the only path to thwarting the whole Harry and Voldemort part-of-each-other thing.
Professor Severus Snape: He's living, and I'll tell you why. He's had an alternate agenda, even in light of the Prince ending, and will finally and completely redeem himself in this final book.
Hermione Grainger: I'm sorry to say that, ever since -- several years ago -- I'd heard that a death in that final chapter upset Rowling to write, I've thought that Hermione will bite the dust in an utterly heroic, yet tragic, way. (I hope I'm so wrong on this one, by the way. I want Hermione and Harry to end up together.)
Ron Weasley: He'll be around far after the final chapter, because really, why bother killing him?
Rubeus Hagrid: He'll die, if for any reason, because he's the last of Harry's father figures.
McGonnagall, Ginny Weasley, Luna, and the rest of Harry's friends (except maybe Neville), are safe, I think. Why kill them; there's no story in it.
Of course, Rowling has killed others that we thought would live until the end of the series, i.e., Sirius and Dumbledore (I dare anyone to say they saw that coming). I reserve the right to be completely off base in my predictions.

A six-item breakfast

It's going to be a good day today, as several little newsy things have captured my attention and focused my pop-culture brain recently. I will not leave you in suspense, but will share them with you immediately:
ITEM!: Ken Jennings, the super brain who kicked everyone's ass on Jeopardy for six months straight in 2004 and won more than $2 million, has started his own blog. It's new, having just started this month, but freakishly, worth a quick look. I'm kinda liking his style, though he tends to get a bit too verbose on a couple posts. Check it out here.
ITEM!: Our main man, David Hasselhoff, is riding high this week, cruising on the wave's crest of Click, in which he plays Adam Sandler's boss, and America's Got Talent, which posted some decent ratings last week. USA Today's got a good-enough article about him today, including a five-question Q&A. In those pieces, the writer explores the wonder that is The Hoff, and why the world loves him so much. (Of his Google hits, most come from Ireland. Germany, once rumored to be the ultimate Hoff lover, came in as third in the ranking.)
ITEM!: Star Jones Reynolds is leaving The View because she seems to fear Rosie O'Donnell. Being's I never really saw a serious physical smackdown in the show's future, I believe this is a ridiculous publicity stunt because she won't be the one to watch on the show anymore. So what.
ITEM!: Sadly, Moose, the Jack Russell Terrier that played Eddie on Frasier, has died. He was 16, and one of the show's most under-appreciated stars.
ITEM!: Yesterday's post must have reached Washington, because the flag-burning amendment was defeated by the one vote that was rumored to kill it. Power to the masses, and those who appreciate the right to express themselves.
ITEM!: I know that everyone considers Christopher Reeve the ultimate Superman, but I'm pretty excited to see this new movie and encourage some new blood in the franchise. I loved Dean Cain as the character (Lois and Clark; and he's still a hotty), and look forward to seeing Brandon Routh in the blue tights. I'd be lying though if I said that was the only attraction though: Kevin Spacey as Lex Luthor? Brilliant! The possibility that Supes may have fathered Lois's son? Emotionally heavy! That scene where his eyeball stops a bullet? The stuff that trailers are made for! It's definitely on tap for our movie watching this weekend.

Go on; burn it

Another strike against free speech: Senators are, right now, debating whether or not banning flag burning should be a Constitutional amendment. The amendment may pass or fail with as slim a margin as one vote, and, if it passes the Senate, it has a good chance of becoming a law. But I, for one, am one of those who do not believe in banning flag burning. (And really, consider yourselves lucky that I'm only composing a post here, rather than uploading the 15-page term paper I wrote for Mass Communications Law on the subject.)
Precedent, the First Amendment, and even the ending soliloquy of The American President understands that burning the flag is an expression of free speech, and that the right to do so should be protected. Disagreeing with the government, and demonstrating that unhappiness, is a right that Americans are duty bound to explore. How better to display your displeasure for something that to burn its flag in effigy? What better way to get someone's attention? (It is strikingly similar to the women in the 1960s burning their bras in shows of protest, yes?)
While the amendment wouldn't prevent flag desecration outright, it would give Congress the power to say how the flag can be protected and what penalties could apply to desecrating it. The House of Representatives has already passed the amendment, and indications show that every one of the 50 states would ratify it.
There were 13 instances of flag burning reported last year, and only six so far this year, according to the Citizens Flag Alliance. It seems to me that a Constitutional amendment is an extreme step to combat an act that isn't even prevalent in society. Is there a rash of flag burnings that I haven't heard about? (Well, among rallies inside our country, of course.) Have there been mass rallies where flag burning has run amok?
You know, banning flag burning within our borders will do nothing to the citizens of other countries who choose to burn the flag in shows of protest. Seriously, I've seen more flag burning overseas then I ever have here, and I suppose, because they're impotent to stop that, lawmakers feel it necessary to curtail our own rights to free speech.
Follow this train of the current lawmakers' misuse of governmental power, and soon enough, I'll be labeled a treasonous non-patriot just for spouting my own opinions on government and how its acting. It's amazing that being the kind of American that the Founding Fathers trumpeted now relegates one to being a subversive malcontent who doesn't love their country.

Cheese pizza and pizzookie

It's Monday morning, and I'm still quite tired. Of course, that has a lot to do with the one-hour flight delay and jetlag, and the general poor rest that comes with the first night's sleep back in my own house, but that's neither here nor there.
The waitress that served JJ, Andy and I our lunch on Saturday is originally from Tempe. She went to high school there, and met her boyfriend at ASU. The freaky coincidence is that she used to wait tables at Oregano's, one of our favorite restaurants in that town, and worked there while B and I lived in the area. (That's a pic of Oregano's patio.) Weird, huh, that she may have waited on us there? Anyway, we got to reminiscing about restaurants in the area. It's nice to know that other people can be as obsessed about dining out as I. She too misses Oregano's and Dilly's Deli. I could have gone on forever about how much I craved Julio G's and Too's, Z Tejas, Pancho's, and all the rest, but I didn't want to scare anyone.

Maybe just some TV and Quizno's

Exhausted, more than a little. I mean, these weekends are always a drain on my energy, but this time, well, we've been home early every day, and I've made the living room floor a good stretching-out spot.
So what's been going on? Just a lot of eating, chatting and all that. I got to spend a tremendous day with Lisa and Mom yesterday up in Santa Barbara doing some shopping. It was a treat to be able to hang out with Lisa all day. Really, I think this weekend has made it more clear how much I miss being close to everyone. I'm eager to get back to Boston and finish up the next five weeks so we can head back west. Today, I had breakfast with Jeff and Liz, and lunch with Andrea and JJ. I haven't decided what Mom, Howie and I are doing for dinner tonight yet, and still am unsure as to whether I will force them to take me to a movie that they've already seen (Cars), so will have to come to some conclusion in the next hour or so.
This afternoon, I saw a guy at the mall wearing a t-shirt that promoted "television.com." I tried to check it out on line, but got an error message. What do you see at television.com? Do you actually see television shows? If that's the case, why not just turn on your television? Someone get to the bottom of this for me.
Also, I heard this morning that Aaron Spelling and E. Pierce Marshall have died. Spelling, as I'm sure you're aware, is the father of choice TV shows such as Charlie's Angels, Dynasty and Beverly Hills 90210. Let's hope that those are the things more likely to get play in his obituaries than the fact that he's the father of Tori. Marshall is the son of Anna Nicole Smith's dead husband, and the bright, shining pain in her ass since she "inherited" all her husband's millions a couple years ago. Here's wondering if the lawsuits will end now, or if Marshall's wife, kids and grandkids will pick up where he left off.

Go, go, go Joseph!

Greetings from Cali!
All is going well, and my first two days here have been chockablock full of food, family and activity. (I'm really quite beyond exhausted.) I logged about 22 hours of awake time yesterday, and I'm still suffering for it. I anticipate a full night's sleep tonight, and hope that I'll be able to hang with the big kids a bit better tomorrow.
Anyway; last night! As it was, yesterday was a good day. The flight was uneventful (except for the 20 minutes spent on the tarmac waiting for the gate to become unoccupied); the lunch at Islands kicked ass; and cruising through Nordstrom is always a good thing.
Mom's "Theater Night" was last night though, and I was bribed into going to the show with a yummy dinner and delicious dessert at Off Vine. The show was one that we had seen before, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. From what I remembered from the first time, I did not thoroughly enjoy it; it was in Egypt; and there was a children's choir involved. Well, let me tell you that since the last time (about 10 years ago maybe), they've done a bit of modernizing to the visual effects of the show. I'll spell it out this way: Day-Glo cheerleaders; Jacob talking on a cell phone; a Western-themed Seven Brides for Seven Brothers dancing segment; Elvis as the king of Egypt; and a disco party finale complete with mirrored pants, short shorts, and a flashing neon backdrop that would make John Travolta proud. In a word: awful. But true to my paganist leanings, the part that offended me the most was not the farcical take on a Bible story, but the blasphemy of Elvis in an Egyptian skirt singing about goats.

Uncreative headline: Attack cat

My July, if you can believe it, is filling up. A month that once was nothing but a highlighted "no work" on July 4 in my planner is beginning to look like my pen’s leaked all over it. And it freaks me out that I'll be turning the page to it as early as next week. Of course, I speak of the stuff that must get done before we leave, as well as the leaving itself. I've scheduled our move for late July, and we anticipate being in Arizona in early August. I won't bore you with everything in the calendar (because what would I write about on the blog on those days?); suffice it to say, it's getting to be a busy time for us.
I'm off to Cali tomorrow morning, and I'm super excited. It's been tough getting the time to visit with everyone I want to see, but I think the schedule has worked out okay. I've got all my clothes figured out, and only need to put them in a bag tonight, so that's good.
Here's this for you: a judge in Connecticut has spared the life of Lewis the cat, who was put on trial for allegedly attacking passersby in his Bridgeport neighborhood. The judge has ordered that the cat remain inside. If the cat does escape the home again, his owner could face up to six months in prison, and Lewis could face death. Neighbors had complained that Lewis' long claws and stealth have allowed him to attack at least six people, and ambush the Avon lady as she got out of her car.

Word lives on forever

I hate living in a life where I can ever be told, “I told you so.” Most of you know this. So it should come as quite a shock to you that I open myself up for Pamela to make such a boast, and to even do the little dance that Grace used to break out with on Will & Grace.
I speak of Blogger, and it’s unpredictable habit of crapping out and messing up posts just as they are being posted. Once this happens, everything is lost forever. She’s told me a couple times, “I do all my writing in Word, and then copy and paste. That way I don’t lose it all.” I’m like, “Yeah, but that stifles my creativity a bit. I prefer to compose in Blogger.”
Today, I revert to Pamela’s way of doing things, as Blogger killed a perfectly brilliant morning post about the weather, boxing up my kitchen, and the mean lady in the park. I had pictures, clever turns of phrase and everything … and the goddamn web site just shit all over it. Now, for all you dying to hear about my weekend, I’m too tired to go into it again, and you can all blame Blogger for missing out.

Gleeful, gleeful!

Hey! I'm feeling really good today. We've been approved for our new place in Scottsdale; the second move estimate came out a lot more favorable than the first; and I think I found a new doctor. Life in Arizona seems to be piecing together well at this point, much to my glee. (Brian's prediction that, "it'll all fall together," has come to pass ... as of now.)
In preparing for the second estimate, I called the local company that we used to move from Allston to the South End, and asked them what the weight of our load was. Ummm .... color me shocked and awed. That move weighed 5,657 pounds. Of course, since it was only across town, the price was an easy $1,822, but that's beside the point. We now had a very real idea of what all our stuff weighs. We've divested ourselves of a bit since then, so the first, 5,200-lb. estimate may have been more on track than we gave it credit for. Anyway, the second estimate actually has our load weighing 5,929 pounds, and would cost us about $5,620. In any language, with more approximate weight and costing about $1,300 less, I think I can safely say that Estimate #1 is a no go.
Our donation pile has grown considerably, and now will house the sofa/sleeper (we'll just get a cheap guest bed when we get to Arizona), and about half of Brian's textbooks (he estimates he's got about 400 pounds of textbooks right now). All the bookcases have already been consigned to the pile, as has our crappy living room sofa that we knew would only be the "Boston sofa," and would be trashed upon our leaving the area (I foresee a nice, leather, regular-length sofa in our future for August). I've already dug through the kitchen and living room and piled crap for the donations. This is the best purging ever.
So, now what? Well, after the final bit of signing and deposit making on the apartment, I start the tiresome process of figuring out utilities and all that, changing addresses on everything from credit cards and catalogs to magazines and Netflix, and laying the groundwork for my job hunt. Brian's employment is of more importance right now, so that'll top the list, but still, I'd like to get a feel for what the market is like for me out there. We've also got to nail down when we'll be leaving here, and tracking our course across country next month. (That'll be a fun series of posts for you loyal readers!) At any rate, the ball is really rolling on this, so I'll be a busy bee for the next several weeks!!

Co-signer's paradise

Where in the sam hell did today go? Seriously, I can't believe that it's after 4 p.m. already, and that I'll be skating out of here in a matter of minutes. What took the day? Well, it looks like we settled on an apartment, and I got to dig through the lease paperwork and all that. Good times. There's nothing better than being in one's early-30s and still requiring Mom's co-signing on an apartment lease. It makes one feel ... well, like one will never be able to do anything without the parents' help. Ever.
It's all good though, peeps, because we -- pending the required credit score and criminal checks -- have an address to move to in Arizona. I won't lie to you; I feel much better right now than I have in a couple weeks. Just having someplace to go is a huge weight off my shoulders!!

Also, here is Mom's last floral arrangment of the season. She's kinda iffy on it, but I like all the ridiculous colors involved. It's kicky.

Today had potential, too

Go on; tell me that this horoscope isn't enough to make me want to run home, crawl under the bed and hide until tomorrow.
"Your plans are being met with harsh opposition today, Kimberly. You have been going along at a slow and steady pace, but you will find that there is abrasive tension that arises the more you try to force your will on others. Gridlock is quite likely due to the fact that there are strong forces coming head to head. Neither one of them are in the mood to yield at this time."
And I had so much I wanted to accomplish in the next eight hours...

Devil went to the bakery

I just made the craziest deal with myself. And it was a real mental process, this deal, which kinda makes the whole thing funnier. So, here it is, about 3 p.m., i.e., snack time. I start to dig through my desk: cinnamon graham crackers, Ritz peanut butter cracker sandwiches, and a Chip's Ahoy 100-calorie pack won't do at all. Maybe a candy bar? In the second drawer is the spare change container, but in reaching for it, I notice the raisins.
Angel on my shoulder: "Raisins would be better for you than chocolate."
Devil on opposite shoulder: "Yeah, but a 3 Musketeers would hit the spot right now."
Angel: "Seriously, go with the raisins."
Devil: "They won't fill me up, and then I'll be hungry when I get home."
Angel: "There are good snacks at home, too. String cheese, yogurt, apples."
Devil: "Cupcakes, too. Don't forget that there are three cupcakes still."
Angel: "Fine. Eat the raisins now, and you can have a cupcake when you get home."
Devil: "Cool. Raisins it is."