Thanks to Amy for giving me the heads up on more information on our freak relationship of the year, Tom and Katie. Do you know what a Scientologist woman must agree to for a completely religious birthing process? Let me give you the bullet points:
* No music. None at all. Including mood-altering Mozart, or mood-enhancing Metallica.
* No drugs of any kind. Epidurals and, I'm sure, alcohol or pot, are included in that blanket rule.
* No speaking in the delivery room. That includes the screams of pain due to the above rule, my friends. Absolute silence must prevail. I wonder if that includes the heavy breathing, which I'll point out, was probably present during conception.
* Newborns can not be poked or prodded for medical testing. Does that mean that cutting the umbilical is also a bad? And the smack on the baby butt?
* Babies may not be spoken to during the first seven days after they are born. (This is my own personal favorite, what with its ridiculousness.) Quoted from MSN's article, "babies go through so much pain during the birth, they shouldn't have to experience any further discomfort or sensory experience that could return later in life to haunt them."
Yeah. Their mom talking to them during their first week alive.
That's going to be their problem.
2 comments:
Couldn't let this one go by without comments:
So baby TomKat will be....
1. Cranky - since music would have relaxed baby, mom and maybe dad.
2. Resented - for pain caused without the support of chemical relief.
3. Confused - why is no one talking- I heard people talking for 9 months and now silence, hhhmm.
4. Anonymous - there goes that paternity test.
5. Thankful - he/she doesn't have to listen to mommy and daddy for seven whole days.
Seriously, I am so happy for the Cruises.
P.
dkgpewf
oh my goodness....this I cannot comprehend...very "cult-ish" to me
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