"Safety!" "Doorknob!"

One of Brian's coworkers told him about an awesome farting game that he and his sons play. Boys, of course, like to fart. This is no surprise. I live with a boy. I also live with two dogs. And a little girl who thinks farts are funny. (Whatever. Brian thinks farts are funny, too.) I only think Daisy's farts are funny, because they surprise her, and she hops up and spins around trying to figure out what has just happened to her. It is among the funniest things I see during my day. Daisy farting rocks.
The game: When someone farts, they say "safety." If a person hears the fart, they try to say "doorknob" before the farter says, "safety." If the "doorknob" is heard before the "safety," the farter gets jumped and hit in the arm 10 times, from each person who heard it. (Obviously, the jumping and hitting isn't hard, just playful.)
Just, for a moment, think about this dentist playing this game with his sons, aged five and seven. Imagine this whole situation going down, where dad doesn't get his "safety" said fast enough, and these two little boys jump and pummel him. In my head, it's beyond adorable. And funny.
I've already beat Brian once tonight by saying "doorknob" faster than he said "safety." I didn't punch him, of course, I tickled him, which was better. I think I will enjoy this ridiculous game. And we'll teach it to Sydney.
Remember this, peeps, because it'll come back to you, and you'll think about it the next time you hear someone fart. I know it'll become regular practice in my house now. Because it's funny.