Insert cheesy V.F. headline here

ITEM!: I dig Steve Irwin. I thought Crocodile Hunter was a cool-ass show, and enjoyed the fervor he brought to animal conservation. I thought he was one of those road-side warriors who didn't fear anything, especially the crocs, and that he was bulletproof. Sadly, we've all had to say goodbye to Irwin this week, courtesy of a stingray and one of the rarest undersea deaths reported. Here's hoping that his compassion, ambition to help animals, and desire to educate people will be carried on.
ITEM!: Paris Hilton was rung up on drunk driving charges. A rich girl like that should really be able to afford a taxi on the way home. No one ever claimed that she was a smart celebutante, but in this day and age, especially with her wallet and support staff, no one should ever be getting behind the wheel after a couple drinks. She chose poorly.
ITEM!: Leave it to one of my favorite magazines to shine the first spotlight on Suri Cruise. I admit to being excited for when this particular issue of Vanity Fair drops into my mailbox, if for any reason, so I can read more about Katie, who apparently spoke more than seven words in the article.
ITEM!: British Prime Minister Tony Blair has agreed to step down within the next year, due to pressure from his political party and the cluster that has become Iraq. It's a shame that resignation is so frowned upon here. Of course, should Bush step down, we're stuck with Cheney. Out of the frying pan, into the fire.
ITEM!: Is it weird that I'm so looking forward to the football season officially starting? There's nothing that signifies the arrival of fall more than teams meeting on the gridiron. You know, it's nice and cool in Boston already.