Monday, March 28
Tiny Thing #212: Jalapeno Jack SunChips, man
You've just heard that your favorite potato chip flavor will no longer be available. Write an indignant letter to the manufacturer.
There are very few delicious and perfect chips in this world. Your Jalapeno Jack flavor is one of those chips. That you have chosen to discontinue this delicious chip is a travesty to the chip aisle, and a blight on mankind's accomplishments in the world. They have the ideal combination of spicy, salty and superb flavor. There aren't many chips of which I can sit and eat the entire bag in one afternoon. I love these chips, you guys, and I'm beyond irritated that you are taking them away from me. How dare you force me into tasting a whole bunch of other, inferior chips to find a replacement? Do you know how long it could be before I find that replacement? I think you should reimburse me for all the chips I have to taste before I find the one I like almost as much as the Jalapeno Jack. In fact, that will be my vow to you. I am going to send you every receipt for every bag of chips I buy in hopes of finding my Jalapeno Jack replacement, with an invoice for you to pay to me. And you will send me checks. I'll let you know if I find anything as good, because I'm not a crook, but I expect you to hold up your end of this bargain.
[Editor's note: I know SunChips aren't potato chips, but I took a bit of a license there to change it up for a real-life situation.]
Posted by Kimmie G at 11:38 PM